Common Sense Business and Social Manners

A common error today is the failure to realize that there are at least two sets of manners-one for the business world and another for the social world. In the business world, it is  not vulgar to talk about money or to bag. But the social world is just the opposite.

• Ina= business, manners are based on rank and position, not on gender. The business lunch or dinner check, for initiated the invitation or the superior in the office. The gender of the person does not alter this tradition.

• Never worry about what service people (waiters, maitre d’s, hotel clerks) think of you. If you use the wrong fork, it is up to the waiter or bus boy to supply you with another. Don’t worry about what he thinks of you.

• If you are critical of someone while at a dinner party, only  to discover  that there (or close relative or friend) of the make a quick and complete U-turn. Add to the defamatory statement, “Of course, that’s the basis of my admiration for him.” Remember dinner table conversation doesn’t have to be logical.

• The notion that it is unhealthy to disguise your feelings has helped lead to a decline in manners and social health. One advantage of a little disguise: You will have more feelings to share with intimates.

Source: Judith Martin, otherwise known as Miss Manners.